Thoughts Feelings & Actions are allegory to Higher Ground

"At this point, you are still making the choices, but you are needlessly burdening yourself with the idea that there is a right choice out there to make, and if you don’t take it, then you have made the wrong choice and will suffer the consequences." THis is crucial and very well developed point in Krishnamurti's discussions. In the river of sight we see our peers move from point A to point B. Thus we think and assert ourselves in the fray where the action is. Now we are goal oriented as if to obtain that figment of intent we associate with normative circumstances. If we thought for a moment we'd see there is no norm. That it is observable that the other is answering for you, takes discipline to say it is good enough they do things for themselves, yet you have no place to be. Here is where I wonder at certain avenues of thought folks encourage toward nostalgia: if someplace is a comfort and sense of security otherly, we may be leaving a piece of ourselves somewhere in the bidden past. The now emerges, the past must be projected forward in the pattern of what this life has become, rather than maintaining a belief we should encourage the illustrative thought into the corner we look out from... In the corner is necessarily NOT in the middle of the room where the potential is greater.
What we have become is asking What is this Life Become, Not what is happening to me so that somehow collusion of our strange straits must be answered for... Start with I AM, & all else follows:
If I carry around with me an answer to my human archetypal sense of relationship, then the mother of the womb that ensured a departure of her consciousness into mine, is this answer NOW in the form of relationship= mother, father whatever!!

But the mother image has to be antediluvian, because I knew her before I knew myself. & father is purely experiential, had I ever bothered to look.
Honestly, it sounds like a cop-out but when I used to smoke a little herb sit in all kinds of uncomfortable positions for long intervals, it is emotionally cathartic...spending the currency of all the frenetic day in that conscious albeit physical/body conscious moments. I liked that, yet even now tho' those conscious pockets say late at night seem as enduring hypnotic, as I think about it now--and a certain Buddhist read will avail my day going forward here momentarily, & makes me feel very comfortable in my own skin. This is the precise affect I am talking about--and no smoking is necessary. According to Dalai Lama's writing in this book AN OPEN HEART, meditation can be had without the requisite (seemingly) mantra & tuning out motive. (mantra is prosaic formulae per ritual) Meaning, he says, what we do as alliterative beings, before his book, is a thing called Analytical Meditation. Just as worthy as any other. I read in his or K. Armstrong's book as well, that Meditation does not lead to compassion, rather a more acute memory... We are not these illustrated thoughts in a thread from point A a particular epiphenomenal fact to point B now projecting that wave now crashing upon the nomenclature of the mind. "THought" is dissolute & all thought is fear, because we seek self-preservation in the current of our "expectation" in the river of sight.
I mitigate loneliness: I stick my nose in a book & I call it a currency of a kind of expression of who I am. I sit here at work & do this as if I am forlorn in the woods where the (real) People are the trees & I am destined to wander. I look down to the earth (the book), it seems to block out the rays of the majesty & penetrating Solarity, I am turning toward something however, I am convinced. Everything I do, wanting to achieve, begs the question,” who will pick up the tab”—I’ll be left wanting that much more, so the answer is always forth-coming: I will pick up the tab!!. Staying up late, a reckless life-style means looking forward to release, so digging deeper into the earth means I’ll bring up more terra-cotta to scatter into the winds, that dissect the earth, blow in my face with scorn-- because a regimen is interrupted—the one suggestive of time well spent. It can be a worthy distraction too, to awaken to the fragmented mind as is our usual condition & the condition we ought not assume its lessening control over our actions. Dostoevskii’s monk sips the vodka, eats the pork--a change is at hand, he saw it, this is against his Orthodoxy ways: his elder rots as he lay dead, so something in life rots (interpreted thusly). There is a world around us, take it in & blow hard. We just need to keep turning-- I don't really get very lonely...I have a lot of solitarian time, as compared to social release & expectation.
No CREATOR, NO meaning, heart OPen Diamond Mind LIGHT STEP~~~

YOGA = to yoke, harness... Mantra is an interesting subject; if you take certain words having antecedents with a unique sense of community as it will become reductive, and we thus are indicated in the baring out of the moments in alert repose--you can get that fly-wheel spinning so that time & place fulminate, and consciousness seeks light. But, mantra is not always necessary, according to two very different practitioners of meditation. I think mitigating your mantra was Crowley's point in BOOK 4, his only relevant read I have come across: from nursery rhymes and obviously the typical AUM. The idea being if you meditate upon Nothing Nothing is its provenance thence. And like what is said in Dalai Lama's book, thinking on "these" things doesn't make you subject to emptiness, as dissociation manifestly will be less of a complaint--that analytical meditation gives you a subject to develop.
Trying to draw in adherents is precisely against the Buddhist's intent. We in the West somehow want to spread equality thru clinging unto belief, & if they can't admit that, then our problems are incindiary visions of the mental apostate's less than compassionate moral polity, breaking the back of those who struggle from those deceptions.
^^**I read about the pre-Aryan reality of Harappa & Mohenjo-Dara (North-western India)=they had some talisman looking like a Shiva god, and this community may have been developing ideas that Hinduism had become. The Aryans coming into the Sind may have recognized certain value in some of their gods, the perennial philosophy placing the gods subject to the same stresses and appeasement as the community of believers incur here in temporal reality...: What happens above happens below!!